May We Be The Remedy...

So i was just reminded in a very big way that we're constantly on stage. All of us. The guy on the street corner begging for some money for this weeks meal,  the man behind the pulpit, the quiet kid in the back of the room, the President, that weird librarian at your school who always smelled like Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup, all of us....

The one thing i've always clung to when talking about my faith is that no one can argue or debate experience. Who was there, what was said, who really is who they say they are and who side of the story is genuine... all debatable. But personal experience is not. 

"I felt this..."

It cant be argued.  Maybe internally it can. A genuine experience however can be questioned by oneself, possibly even doubtfully disputed, but will always come undeniably full circle. So the problem that i was introduced to this week was the fact that we (I) forget that every move we make, word we say, weather it be out of love, hate, apathy or negligence affects that experience for others. In the same way that no one can tell me that i'm wrong in knowing that God is constantly changing me for the better and working in me, i can't argue with someone who has had a genuinely negative experience associated with the church, any church. 

And it is so hard to change a first impression. So hard. 

So may our lives in no way contradict our profession of change. May they encourage and exhort those around us. Accept and not just tolerate with hidden agendas.... 

I'm reminded of a prayer that i once asked my church to pray with me:

"God awaken this Nation. Awaken this body of the living God. Set lives on fire for you and consume us so that our skin couldn't contain the light of Your glory. I believe with my whole heart that You are the Living God who reigns from everlasting to everlasting. Declaring the end from the beginning. I believe that Your breath brought life to all creation. I believe in You sovereignty. So i believe that you can revive this body. I want to see miracles happen. I want lame legs to rise up in strength and run from city to city declaring Your greatness. I want deaf ears to be opened and hear the praise of Your beloved body in all of creation. I want to see deliverance. Empower and encourage this body. Your body.

But if no one else will. Use me. 

Let me be one to deliver the broken heart by Your power and authority. Use my pathetic and weak hands that have been made righteous beyond all compare to bring wholeness to the empty. If no one else will use me. 

I'm scared and i don't know where to start so give me an unquenchable passion and a clear vision of purpose.

If no one else will. Use me."

When January looks more like June: A Letter....

To quote  blog i posted on here early last year...

 "It seems like there's a cycle that creeps up on me each year. October always sets the scene, November's always got me singing December's love song, and January always brings some beautiful twist to kick me in the teeth."

Ok so i was wrong. Of course You wouldn't have told me that though... Or maybe it's not that You didn't tell me so much as i couldn't understand. Your word tells a story of how You spoke to Your people...

"Then a voice came out of heaven, "I have both glorified it, and i will glorify it again." So the crowd who stood there was saying it was thunder. Others said and Angel had spoken to Him. Jesus spoke and said, "This voice was not for my sake but for your sakes."

-John 12:28

Some heard thunder... hmmmm. When i think about one crowd of people hearing the same voice so differently it makes me realize that, just like so many of those people, i just hadn't been prepared to hear Your voice. And the thunder ringing in my ears for the past year has been driving me crazy. So i waited for January to come again with it's "beautiful twist" and was disappointed when it didn't. You spoke then and all i heard was noise...

CRASH CRASH CRASH CRASH

I can see now that it's ridiculous to assign Your seasons for us to silly names likes Months that we've put on time when time means nothing to You. Sometimes January looks more like May, or June. And now that my heart is prepared to hear what You have to speak into it the crash sounds so much less like a warning and so much more like direction. Prepare our hearts and awaken them to to hear Your voice. I can't imagine wasting more time pushing through chaotic sounds, when it's no one's fault but my own. 

So thank You for seasons, even if they don't come along when i expected them on my schedule. Thank You for January and June. And i promise i'll do my best to not mess this up like i did the last time. 

Thanks for Your patience with me.

-DG